I was born in the elevator going up to the third floor at Auburn Memorial Hospital in NYS. Well, truthfully, my head entered the cold air, but my body waited until we reached the delivery room. I like to joke with people when I tell them this and say that I've been having my ups and downs ever since. Well, that part is true, just as it is for most of us, but the key thing to remember is that the elevator was going up. A sweet and wise gentleman pointed that out to me a couple of years ago and I am grateful.
So, last week, when I received an awful shock that my hours at work had been cut in half, I didn't handle it well--at first. I asked our GM if he'd like me to lay down on the floor so he could kick me. He wasn't pleased. I wasn't either. I didn't deserve this to happen. I'm a good employee and I work consistently if not super fast, but I'm dependable and trustworthy and I do my best for the company. I was, in a word, heartbroken. I was also scared. Trying to survive on half my income isn't possible without some serious help. So, I dutifully applied for unemployment and this week I will be talking to SS. My CEO informed me this week that he will try to bring me back to full time as soon as he can. Wish someone had told me that last week when I desperately needed to hear it!
Once the shock wore off, I can't say I was any less scared, but I realized it could have been so much worse. I'm still employed albeit part-time and no benefits, I have a little more time now to accomplish some things that I've been putting off for a while, AND I can still work on my books. The books come first; the lovely thing about housework is that it will still be there when I'm ready to do it. I do try to keep up on the basics--dishes, laundry, sweeping the floors and dusting, but since I'm allergic to dust--both to breathe and to touch--I generally vacuum the dust.
I will survive. I am a very determined woman, feisty to the core, and nothing gets me down for very long. I'm back up and ready to try again in no time. I've always been that way as a dear friend once pointed out to me long ago. I don't think I could have survived my childhood if I hadn't been that way.
However, now, I have an added benefit--the most important one of all: my testimony and faith in Jesus Christ and God, their love for me, and my belief that when a window closes, God will open a door for me. I don't know what is going to happen. I don't have any real answers at the moment. All I can do, I will do--and ask God to help and guide me. I believe He will. He has guided me before for which I am very grateful...
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